To be Less Polarized, We Must Humanize (with Esther Perel)

Baratunde ends Season One focused on the state of our relationships, a key pillar of how to citizen, and thus the health of our society after the most contentious election in modern history. In conversation with world-renowned relationship expert, Esther Perel, they discuss how to repair relationships in this moment, and how choosing to listen and humanize each other is not only how to citizen, but enlightened self-interest.   Show Notes + Links We are grateful to Esther Perel for joining us! Follow her @EstherPerelOfficial on IG or @estherperel on Twitter. or find more of her work at EstherPerel.com.  We will post this episode, a transcript, show notes and more at howtocitizen.com. Please show your support for the show in the form of a review and rating. It makes a huge difference with the algorithmic overlords!  INTERNAL ACTIONS  What is your model of relationships? Were you raised to believe in self-reliance and autonomy or interdependence and loyalty? Do you conceive of yourself as an “I” trying to develop a “We” or the other way around?   Take inventory of the relationships in your life.  Identify relationships in your life that are polarized over politics. Determine which make you truly unsafe that you must let go, then focus on those where you are still committed to some level of relationship and you can still see possibility. In those relationships, make the choice to humanize the person, listen, and find common ground, no matter how small. Reflect on your own behavior and language. Can you acknowledge any responsibility for the state of the relationship?   Examine your own perspectives about people who vote differently than you.  What about your view or beliefs about “these people” makes you fearful? If these thoughts were reversed, would they sound fair or accurate to you? Can you imagine another dimension to one of them as to why they vote or behave the way they do?    EXTERNAL ACTIONS Choose to deepen one or two relationships with people who voted differently from you. Instead of ignoring how a loved