The Agonizing Lack of Give in a Covert Narcissist

<p>I am going to try to explain the unexplainable. The lack of give when communicating with a covert narcissist. The absence of the regular flow of give and take that thus makes you feel that you are talking to a void. It is painful, absolutely exhausting, and crushing to your spirit</p> <p>When in regular casual conversation with someone, we often confirm that we are hearing what the other person is saying. We make little sounds, comments, and gestures: such as a nod, a smile, yeah, uh-huh, true, sure, etc. People react to each other in conversation.</p> <p>All these remarks show understanding, agreement or support. At the very least they validate your interaction with this person. You don’t feel like you are talking into a void.&nbsp;</p> <p>This give and take does not happen with a covert narcissist. You are met with the most agonizing silence, so empty and painful. When talking with my CN husband, I would get to a spot in the conversation where people naturally interject something. So I would pause in expectation. Nothing! Silence. Awkwardness. Emptiness.</p> <p>So I go on talking, wondering if I am being heard, wondering if I am making sense</p> <p>When dealing with a covert narcissist, there is no slack, no margin, no benefit of the doubt. There is no give!</p> <p>Trying to understand this is like trying to catch a ghost. As soon as you think you have a grasp on it, it disappears again. We are trying to understand something that is almost impossible to even talk about.</p> <p>It’s hard because it isn’t always in what they did, it’s in what they didn’t do. What they didn’t say. That stone-cold silence and lack of give.</p> <p>Coming soon: Why do covert narcissists have such an extreme inability to offer that give that is so necessary in relationships?</p> --- Support this podcast: <a href="https://anchor.fm/covertnarcissism/support" rel="payment">https://anchor.fm/covertnarcissism/support</a>