Spiritual Parenthood

Asma Sherif Moneer

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One time I was complaining to one of my teachers that it was so much harder for me to progress spiritually since I became a mama. I wasn’t willing to leave my daughter for months to go on a retreat, and I barely found time to sleep, let alone meditate daily. I asked the teacher, whom I deeply trusted, “What should I do?” My teacher asked me if I had heard of Dipa Ma. Of course, I hadn’t. She explained that Dipa Ma’s specialty was helping householders cultivate their practice and helping them see that spiritual attainments were possible – even as a stay-at-home parent. Dipa Ma had some pretty big tragedies happen in her life – losing her mom at just 18 and taking in her bother to raise as a result, having two children die, and then her husband suddenly dying in 1957. She also developed chronic physical pains. Despite all that, she kept with her a love and passion for studying Buddhism and spirituality and is a very respected Vipassana teacher. The gift I received from reading about Dipa Ma was how she turned her everyday life into spiritual practice, and how she also made sure she made time for it each day. You see, one of the things I see a lot in the students I coach in Freedom School is this idea of “either/or thinking.” As if things are either one ORthe other, with no middle ground. But in these scenarios, we often CAN find a middle way, right? Dipa Ma talked about committing to your practice, waking up in the dark and getting in 1-2 hours of meditation before her children woke up. She would teach other mothers in Calcutta the importance of prioritizing spiritual practice and doing what it takes (she was no trust-funder!). She found a balance between family life and spiritual life - alternating between being home and going on retreats. Once I decided to commit to prioritizing my spiritual practice as part of putting family first - that the

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