Side Chat: Your needs & your wants are VERY different

<p>So … I was in a therapy session and my therapist said something that filled me with, as I told Kristen during this episode, “The wrath of hell.”</p> <p>Why? Because she, unintentionally, broke one of the cardinal rules of anyone who’s in a therapy/coaching/healing profession: <em>Make the person in front of you feel seen and heard.</em></p> <p>I brought her my very raw, tender emotions about something that was deeply troubling me, and in her attempt to help, she used an analogy that made me feel <em>very</em> unseen and unheard–and worse than that, almost made me feel gaslit and belittled. Cue rage erupting from me akin to the fires of hell.</p> <p>But, in classic fashion, my rage gave me an opportunity to coach <em>myself</em> (it turns out, of the two of us I’m probably the better coach for me anyway). And in getting to the bottom of <em>why</em> I was so triggered, I made a HUGE realization:</p> <p><strong>I was angry because she had treated one of my needs as if it was a want. So, I decided we definitely need to have a Side Chat about this! Listen in as Kristen and I talk about…</strong></p> <ul> <li>The analogy she used that made me feel like she was diminishing my needs.</li> <li>How, in an attempt to be evolved, we often end up gaslighting <em>ourselves</em> out of having needs.</li> <li>Why treating needs as needs, rather than wants, makes room for you to have ALL the uncomfortable emotions, without feeling guilty about it.</li> <li>Why it’s <em>totally</em> normal to be attached to your needs, and how you definitely <em>don’t</em> have to worry that being attached will mess up your ability to receive what you want.</li> </ul> <p>After you listen, <a href= "https://clarityonfire.com/needs-wants-different" target="_blank" rel="noopener">come leave a comment</a> to share something you’ve been treating as a want, that might actually be a need!</p> <p>COMMUNITY UPDATES!</p> <p>We’ve got a LOT happening <a href="patreon.com/clarityonfire" target="_blank" rel="noopener">in our Patreon community</a> this mont