Praise Publicly

Good morning, Five Minute Families. Do you ever cringe when you see a video of a parent shaming his or her child? Like one of those where the child is standing on the street corner with sign stating what they did wrong. Ephesians 6:4 admonishes us parents, “Fathers, don’t stir up anger in your children, but bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.” Public shaming seems to fit in the category of stirring up anger in our children to us. Notable greats throughout history have applied the “praise publicly; criticize privately” adage and applied it quite effectively. Vince Lombardi won five national football championships, and he was a big proponent of the concept. Many families will adopt such a motto or tailor it to themselves with something more along the lines of “praise in public; punish in private” or “public commendations; private corrections.” Appreciation feels good, and as family members, we should desire to bring good and fond attention to our loved ones’ strengths. Proverbs 27:2 points out that we are to let another praise us instead of ourselves, so if family members make it their goal to praise one another in public, it helps build trust and admiration within the family unit. To be biblically strong, our family identities must include a culture of constructive correction. A large part of parenting is remembering that Hebrews 12:6 tells us that even “the Lord disciplines the one he loves and punishes every son he receives.” Constructive feedback about our weaknesses and how to address them is helpful and good. While the term criticism may have negative connotations, we must remember the discipline, instruction, admonition, and punishment are all aspects of learning that a child (and, truly, we adults as well) need in order to grow more mature and responsible and to grow in the sanctification process. A second reason for private correction comes from Matthew 18:15 which encourages us that, “If your brother sins, go and show him his fault in private; if he listens to you, you have wo