On Speaking Up for Yourself and When to Do It

<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Last week we talked about rising above the need to be right. The episode was aimed at the more talkative, assertive ones among us. Today we’re talking about the opposite -- when to speak up for yourself. This episode is primarily for the quiet ones who tend to hold their cards close to their chest.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">As children, many of us were expected to “not talk back” to authority figures. That strategy has its place when you’re a child, but once you’re an adult, it’s important -- for others and for yourself -- that you make your thoughts and feelings known...when it comes to certain topics, and at appropriate times. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Here’s why.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Speaking up for yourself…</span></p> <ul> <li style="font-weight: 400;"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Gives others a chance to understand you. </span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Gives others a chance to explain themselves and clear up any confusion.</span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Gives others a chance to meet your expectations.</span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;"><span style= "font-weight: 400;">Removes any doubt about whether or not you approve of the other party’s beliefs or behavior</span></li> </ul> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I’m not implying that you should expect something in exchange for your honesty. Don’t expect the other party to change, agree, or to comply. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The act of speaking up is purely for yourself and for your personal growth. It’s about honoring yourself, your beliefs, and your values.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">When considering speaking up for yourself, timing is extremely important. If you’re in the midst of a heated discussion, don’t even think about doing it then. When emotions are high, it’s unlikely that either party is in a calm, rational place.