Grief - Anticipatory Grief

TRANSCRIPT: Good morning, Five Minute Families. I come to you this week with a hurting heart. We are facing the imminent death of someone we love. In fact, I am alone with you today while Kim is with our extended family. We know that many of you are facing the same thing – the impending death of someone dear to you. As you know too well, even before the loss happens, the pain begins. Anticipatory grief may carry many of the same indications of grief after death – sadness, anger, isolation, forgetfulness, depression, exhaustion, and more. Many of us have heard of the classic stages of grief including denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. As any counselor or grief mentor will tell you, those stages are not all-inclusive nor are they experienced in a linear progression. A plate of spaghetti that is jumbled up and touching several aspects of life would be a better analogy. So, with heavy hearts and that jumble in mind, let us examine how we can help and support each other during such a time. Listen. Often, we think we know how the other person will deal with the impending death of a loved one, but the intro into the grief journey is as unique as the grief process itself. We must let our loved one share their hurts, needs, and pain without twisting it into our own ways of coping. Likewise, don’t try to fix how your loved one is dealing with his or her grief. You might think the person needs to talk more or talk less or push harder or push less. We each deal with grief differently. If the person is in denial, you keep walking beside them, helping with arrangements as needed. Pray often and seek the Lord’s leading when you feel at a loss for what to say. Encourage one another in self-care. Stress wreaks havoc on the immune system, and allowing each person the sleep, nutrition, exercise, and quiet time they need to reengage in a healthy way is extremely important. Understand that guilt and anger feelings may abound in this time. It is now during the anticipatory grief period that