Episode 83: Philippa Perry

<p>Philippa Perry is a psychotherapist, artist and writer who has a weekly agony aunt column&nbsp;in the Observer. She has written the only book on parenting that I feel speaks to me, and that I recommend to other people.&nbsp;It's called: 'The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read (and Your Children Will be Glad That You Did)'.&nbsp;Her big messages are that talking to your children about feelings is key, and that all feelings are acceptable, so don't shut them down.&nbsp;I agreed with her when&nbsp;she&nbsp;said: how well you get on with people is more important than how well you do in your&nbsp;GCSEs.</p><br><p>I met up with Philippa (and her mischievous cat Kevin) in mid December at the beautiful&nbsp;Georgian house she shares with her husband, the recently knighted artist, Sir Grayson Perry.&nbsp;We sat in their living room with the fire going, and part way through the conversation she pointed out that the fireplace is a stucco art piece about fertility, made by Philippa herself, when she was trying to get pregnant.&nbsp;31 years on their daughter Flo, also an artist, has recently illustrated Philippa's graphic novel 'Couch Fiction', about the world of psychotherapy.</p><br><p>Philippa shared how, as a child, her nanny had been her most signifiant other, but when she was sent to boarding school aged 4 she never saw her again, which deeply upset her. This experience impacted Philippa's style of parenting, and she didn't want any outside help, retraining as a psychotherapist when her daughter was 18 months old, and only working while her daughter was at school.</p><br><p>Today she divides her time between writing and art. She talked about how exciting it is to have, as Virginia Woolf described, a room of one's own, dedicated to creating art.&nbsp;</p><br><p>We talked about teaching children to communicate, and when we touched on the subject of sibling rivalry, Philippa got me to do some role-play with her.&nbsp;She showed me how getting the children to brainstorm, to solve a dispute, is so much better than a par