EP 356: Never Feeling Good Enough with Dana

<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">This episode is about never feeling good enough and always looking for what could go wrong. Today’s caller, Dana, didn’t have her needs met as a child and built a protective pattern to help her cope with her abandonment wound. We work through ways to calm her nervous system and feel safe when asking for what she needs.</span></p> <p> </p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">[For show notes, go here:</span> <a href="http://christinehassler.com/episode356"><span style= "font-weight: 400;">Christinehassler.com/episode356</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">]</span></p> <p> </p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Whether or not you grew up in a house where you felt like your needs were not met, all of us can relate to feeling not good enough, or the feeling that things in our lives are not good enough. Or, we can be either incredibly critical of ourselves or other people. We get ourselves into a vicious cycle.</span></p> <p> </p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">When we have unmet needs, especially if we were raised in a way where we couldn’t have an outburst, had to be the good kid, or had to keep it together, it caused us to keep stuff inside. Those of us who had to withhold a lot as children can be mean to people internally but when it comes to saying something externally, we cower.</span></p> <p> </p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">When we have awareness about one of our protective patterns, we don’t want to expect that we are immediately going to change it. That would just set us up for an Expectation Hangover and offer us more opportunities to beat ourselves up.</span></p> <p> </p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The purpose of personal development is not an overnight transformation. As evolving human beings, personal transformation is more about gaining awareness. We can spot the patterns we fall into and then work with ourselves while we are in the pattern.</span></p> <p> </p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">True transformation comes when we find ourselves i