Defense Against the Dark Arts

<p>New information on the Astros cheating scandal<a href="https://www.cbssports.com/mlb/news/astros-sign-stealing-scandal-gm-jeff-luhnow-was-aware-of-codebreaker-algorithm-report-says/"> implicates interns, Excel, and Harry Potter.</a>  Were the right people punished? Still not over, friends, still not over. </p><p>At the time of recording, the Mookie Betts trade remained up in the air, leading us to agree with Justin Turner that journalists shoving decorum to the side to get a scoop can make a real mess of things. Speaking of messes, the Player’s Union and <a href="https://theathletic.com/1592997/2020/02/08/rosenthal-delayed-trade-and-awkward-arbitration-hearing-prompt-more-friction-between-players-and-the-league/">Joc Pederson</a> got the shaft from MLB and the Arbitration Panel, who forced Pederson to negotiate salary with the Dodgers even when he was an active trade chip with the Angels. </p><p>Boyfriends this week begin in Tampa Bay, or in Pottymouth’s case, Japan.  <a href="https://english.kyodonews.net/news/2019/01/78c61420d0f1-baseball-baystars-tsutsugo-slugs-japans-youth-baseball-culture.html">Yoshitomo “Yoshi” Tsutsugo</a> joins the Rays this year after 10 years with the Yokahama Baystars, and a stint in the Dominican League, learning to “play with heart.” Patti chose Brandon “Bamm Bamm” Lowe, but all signs point to <a href="https://web.archive.org/web/20190619193712/https://raytank.mlblogs.com/brandon-lowe-madison-lowe-rake-99b72864147e?gi=807dca7f3d3a">Brandon’s wife Madison</a> as Patti’s real choice for Rays BF. Pottymouth brings us a new Omar to love, this time catcher <a href="https://www.lookoutlanding.com/2019/1/23/18192416/40-in-40-omar-narvaez">Omar Navaráez</a>, whose goal is to bring baseball to Ecuador, eventually. Patti can’t quit <a href="https://www.tmj4.com/sports/baseball/milwaukee-brewers/brewers-outfielder-christian-yelich-could-become-the-face-of-baseball-wall-st-journal-argues">Christian Yelich</a>, and declares him her keeper BF for this season. Maybe it’s the Body Issue,