An inside attack. Making friends with old mate doubt

Hello Hedge Schoolers,<br/><br/>A welcome to you from the Surf Coast of the Bellarine Peninsula. My family and I are once again in our happy place, Ocean Grove. Beach air, the novelty of new routines, and plenty of rest are just the remedy for the welcoming of the Winter Solstice. The shortest day of the year marking the first steps towards Spring. Towards new life. For me, that life is the birth of a book, a process I know little about. The fumbling steps of a newborn have begun with the first draft being finished and now edited with precision and care by my dear friend Leslie Lau. It is a joyous gift I will return to Leslie as his first draft sits in my inbox. Together we are learning on the go and sharing the journey publicly. <br/><br/>Reading and writing have gifted me so much over the years and I find the closer I am to the holding of my own book, the more my old mate doubt wants to pull up a seat and have a chat. <br/><br/>This week's inquiry is a stilling of my urge to run from him and the penning of a tribute to a voice that has always had my best interests at heart but sometimes sucks at delivery. <br/><br/>Old mate Doubt<br/><br/>&#8220;Until my song comes here to learn its words, my art is but the hope of song&#8221; Wendell Berry - The Peace of Wild Things<br/><br/>Old mate doubt. Someone who knows you better than anyone else. A voice. A feeling. An energy. Who knows. Doubt helps shine a light on areas you find hard to see, sharpening your eyesight to ensure that all is well in your world. A loyal soldier, as Bill Plotkin, would call it. <br/><br/>Unfortunately, like many of you, I feel off when they are in the room. Like their presence indicates that I'm not ok. A presence I find myself scrambling to get away from. A reign of chaos when I so desperately crave order. <br/><br/>Lately, I've been working on improving my relationship with doubt. Building the courage to sit in the doubt? To start with the thought (or thoughts) and move through to the emotions that the thought brings about. Can I follow d