65: Dealing With Challenges In Relationships with Andrew

<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">There are many common, limiting beliefs when it comes to love and romance. One belief is the success of a relationship is based on the time it lasts. So, if there is a breakup or divorce, the relationship was considered a failure. Or, if you love someone, you must love them unconditionally and stay with them, for better or for worse, no matter what. Another limiting belief is, the purpose of a romantic relationship is to find THE one who completes you.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">In today’s coaching session, we bust through the limiting beliefs to get down to love and truth. Today’s caller, Andrew, finds himself at a challenging crossroads  in his marriage. He would like to know how to be supportive to his wife after her recent cancer diagnosis without becoming a doormat.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Andrew shared he is working towards a growth mindset, and up until now his wife has had more of a victim mindset. While I only got to hear one side, I didn’t hear any blame or resentment from Andrew as he shared his story, so I sense his description of the situation is fairly accurate. That is why I coached him to love his wife, to support her and to hold space for her, as she and the entire family process this diagnosis. And in time, have a heart-to-heart with her about how they plan to journey through this Expectation Hangover together.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Diagnoses can be an opportunity for deep healing and transformation. Sometimes, what is for the highest good is not always the easiest or most obvious choice. I coached Andrew through the distinction of spiritual connection and spiritual bypass. It basically comes down to love and truth. Andrew loves his wife, but in truth, they may be growing in different directions. Does this mean the relationship should end? I don’t believe in shoulds. People in a relationship can be growing at different speeds, but still along the same path.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: