37: What Were You Thinking?!

<p>Joani Geltman has over 30 years of experience working with parents, children, schools, and community groups. She is also a parenting coach, college professor, and public speaker. Her book, A Survival Guide to Parenting Teens, helps parents navigate the challenge of raising teens. In this episode, Joani discusses some of the reasons why our children frustrate us the most, and how it’s not always their fault they’re not thinking things through.</p> <p>Key Takeaways<br /> Have you ever asked, “What were you thinking?’ to your teen?<br /> The teenage brain is still growing, and parents often forget that their teen lacks experience.<br /> Parents are looking art their teens from an adult brain.<br /> Your consequences, you grounding them, is nowhere in their brain when they’re being impulsive.<br /> You telling your child not to do something is not a strategy.<br /> Small children respond okay with a voice of authority. In adolescence, this backfires.<br /> All family members are going through major transitions in their life simultaneously.<br /> What can you do if you’re having a fight with your teen?<br /> Teens just want you to acknowledge what you’re feeling.<br /> How can you talk to your teens about safety?<br /> As a parent, sometimes you can preface by saying, “I wouldn't be your mom/dad if I didn’t ask this..” to help your teen understand that you care.</p> <p>Resources<br /> Sponsored by Gear Up Great State of Vermont: Veop.org/gear-up<br /> Joanigeltman.com<br /> A Survival Guide to Parenting Teens by Joani Geltman</p> <p><br /> Quotes:</p> <p>“Kids feel before they think. It’s a brain that’s a volcano waiting to erupt.”</p> <p>“It’s not what you say, it’s how you say it. With teens, that’s especially important.”</p> <p>“Your teens might grumble, but you’ve now planted a seed with it; their safety.”</p>